Monday, July 23, 2012

Day 101 - Compassion and Patience


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not give myself the patience that is needed to walk myself within time and space - to walk these points to completion and walk all dimensions of each point that is/has within/become me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want all points within me to immediately be done and over with and in this apply myself with harshness towards myself for the first few days when facing a point in this using energy to move myself through a point instead of using physically applied compassion where I understand/know myself in the point and apply myself within breath gently and simply use breath to walk myself through the point

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fight with myself within the mind using thoughts and emotion to attack myself for my physical actions in which I judge based on morality and ethics in an attempt to get myself to not to that which I am judging - not realizing that I am in this separating myself from the decision to participate in said actions and I am thus then relying on an external force existent within thought to stop me from participating in said actions - not realizing that it was first my participation in thought that lead me to participate in said actions

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to expect myself to move through points within one breath instead of realizing and living the fact that it took me years to develop myself in how I exist now and it will thus take me years of walking myself backwards to correct myself into a being that is worthy of life through giving life back to life through doing what is best for all life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not give myself the compassion towards myself needed to move through specific points - compassion here being an understanding of myself - a knowing of myself - in this not being hard on myself within judgment because I understand myself - I know myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to continue to be hard on myself because I do know myself and I do know what I am participating in, and  I understand how I get myself to participate within the actions yet I do nothing to correct myself through stopping the participation within the thoughts that lead me to participate within the action - in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from the decision of my actions through continuing to be hard on myself when I understand myself - and in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not stand equal to myself within/as the decision to participate in that which I choose to participate in

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fail to see that I have purposely allowed myself to separate myself from myself in the decision to participate in the thoughts and actions to deliberately allow myself to continue to participate in the actions that I judge and am hard/harsh with myself for participating in - deliberately continuing the cycle of self hate to justify myself participating in the actions that I judge and am harsh on myself for because if I beat myself up for participating in the actions I have defined as bad then it will be ok for me to again participate in the actions

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not live a solution of myself within compassion and patience with myself where in compassion I stand equal to myself in every action and in this live compassion within equality and oneness - understanding that which I am participating in and the consequences and results of that which I participate in and live compassion within equality and oneness where I consider everyone within my actions within equality and ask myself if I would like to be treated that way

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not give myself the patience needed to walk points in a complete understanding of every dimension of the point wherein I give myself the time needed and the gentleness of breathing as I walk through my life backwards investigating how I have gotten to this point of myself today

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not place myself within breath as I walk my life backwards and in this give myself the patience and compassion needed for this journey through stopping myself within the mind projecting into outcomes and what ifs through keeping myself here in breath and releasing myself from the harshness of energy within breathing - because within breath I am here and I am within the flow of the inhale and exhale of breath in this creating a gentleness onto myself through allowing myself to be here with myself in breath - in this walking myself in humbleness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I am able to be humble with myself through applying myself in breath and that as I participate in the energy within thoughts feelings and emotions I am not being humble with myself because I as I go into the energy I realize that it is like a storm that runs throughout the body and sends lightning everywhere and that within breath I calm the storm of myself that is the mind

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not apply myself within being humble with myself as I walk my points throughout my life - but to be hard and difficult with myself which is only causing my points to be much more difficult to see myself within through my acceptance and allowance of myself being difficult and harsh with myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that walking humbleness will be a point for myself to stand equal to because I have not learnt how to be humble with myself throughout my life - I have only learnt to judge myself and be hard on myself and be hard on this life that is here and  to in this not come up with any real livable solution to what is here as myself but to only judge and barrage it with hate and anger not living forgiveness itself within the point - in this I realize that forgiveness is not to continue to allow it to exist but to realize what the point actually is and how it has come to be - to `know` it entirely - putting an end to all points that are not what is best for all life - through forgiving self for not doing what is best for all life as self

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize myself beyond the judgment and harshness that I have become through applying myself within breathing and directing myself within the application of breathing as I move throughout my day and in this directing myself to do what is best for me as life and to let go of the harshness and judgment that I have lived towards myself and this world

I commit myself to allowing myself to apply myself within breathing when I participate in an activity that I normally judge myself within and in this to move beyond the judgment in that moment and investigate myself in what I accepted and allowed within myself in that moment that lead me to participate in the action and to in this as well see the action for what it really is and to see myself within the action for who I really am

I commit myself to applying myself in humbleness as I walk throughout my day allowing myself to be gentle on myself within breath so that I do not bombard myself with too much energy through the emotions and feelings that I create



I commit myself to standing equal and one to myself in all actions that I participate within - realizing who I am within each and every action and to in this forgive what is not best for all life and to correct myself into living what is best for all life

I commit myself to when and as I find myself judging myself for participating in specific actions/events to in that moment forgive and let go - and do not look back but to remove all memory of it and to direct myself within breath here letting go of the immediate past and forgiving myself within it - directing myself in that moment anew.

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