Day 108 - I Want More Time

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that time in this reality in finite and that I am only ever going to have a finite amount of time, within which I am able to direct myself within while I am still breathing on this Earth, and that I am not going to have an unlimited amount of time before the time of my death and that I am not going to have an unlimited amount of time to live in a way where I can both live within self-interest and fuck around within energy and the mind and to live a life of responsibility where I dedicate myself within the time to myself as life in making this life the best life possible and giving my effort and time equally to all life here in making this life as all life the best life possible within equality and oneness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want more time within this one life that I have on this Earth so that I can participate more within self-interest where I allow myself to fuck around in this reality be it playing video games, drinking, clubbing, partying, smoking pot, travelling, eating gourmet foods, house hunting, etc, in this defining fucking around within the context of only looking out for self and self's life and interests, allowing self to ignore the fact that this Earth that we all live on has been and still is a hell for all life living within/on/as it, and that I as life am responsible for the quality of life here through/as my effort and time given to the quality of all live, vs the time and effort I have put into striving and searching for my own happiness and existing within the desires within the mind

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that we as humanity and life are on the 11th hour of our existence and we are not realizing the effort that we as a whole and collective must put in to ourselves to change our actions to equality and oneness within living what is best for all life and correct our living actions and words to that which supports all life equally on this planet, before we reach a point of no return, if we already haven't, to correct our actions within/as/on this Earth as life as who we really are, in this I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to not realize that the point of no return is the point of death - it is the final moment of ourselves and we will either birth ourselves here as life in the physical and be life - or end at death where we will not return to life here within the physical as we had the opportunity to birth ourselves here as life as we are here on this earth, but we squandered our time and effort for our own happiness instead of creating a life that is best for all life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deceive myself within allowing myself to believe that I have all the time in the world, when in fact I do not, I only have the time within my breaths within/as the physical here to create myself as life where I as life support life and that when my breaths end here I will either have birthed myself here as life through as giving up my life of happiness and self-interest to giving all life here the best life possible through doing all that I can to support the equal money system and doing all that I can within each breath to realize myself through investigating myself and understanding why I am only a system of self-interest that only looks out for my own happiness and self-interest and to forgive this way of `life` that I have accepted and allowed myself to be and change my actions into actions that are always within the interest of what is best for all life here on this Earth within the physical needs of all life here on earth such as shelter, food, water, clothing, heat, education, social interaction, Health Care, thus within creating my actions that are constantly and consistently what is best for all life I, with all of humanity, birth life here from the physical as ourselves through manifesting what is best for all life through/as the collective actions of ourselves as humanity.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to avoid taking responsibility for my part in this world through allowing myself to use time for my own self-interest where I deny and avoid the fact that this reality exists within the principles of equality and oneness where all life on this planet in equally valuable - if it weren't for mosquitoes many things would not exist or be functional as it is today - thus a mosquitoes life is equally valuable to a humans, if not more because a mosquito contributes to life while the human destroys life, but within living within self-interest within the time that I have on this Earth measured by the breaths that I am I am deny the fact that this world is rapidly heading towards destruction by our hands and in this not giving up my time and life to support a life that is best for all where abuse does not exist

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want more time to my life so that I can continue to live the way that I have been living and to intermittently support life through giving up some of my time to live supporting what is best for life - not realizing that I have to change my lived actions entirely to support a life that is best for all because with one accepted and allowed action of abuse, I am able to accumulate that into a lived pattern of abuse and in this repeat the same actions and living conditions that is currently existent here on Earth, and that within giving up my time and life for life I thus birth myself as life within equality and oneness as how this reality in fact functions, stopping myself living for one as myself where I believe I exist as an island - in this not realizing that I am life - a part of a whole, in this not living who I really am as a part of a whole within equality and oneness within the microscopic and within the universal.

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto the memories of where I have allowed myself to live for myself and participate within self-interest causing myself to live those memories over again because I have allowed myself to attach a value to the happiness that I experienced in this allowing myself to repeat the patterns of living within self-interest and to in this not change for real where all is forgiven and let go and I direct myself and live myself here as life in support of a best life for all life living here on this Earth

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I want more time only to continue to exist within self-interest and to continue to live within the patterns and habits that I have developed for myself while intermittently given some of the time that I have here to support a life that is best for all - not realizing that only within giving up all of my self-interested actions/habits/lifestyles am I actually able to support a life that is best for all as I will be living within the constant and consistent consideration of all life here within equality and oneness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear letting go of this life that I have been living within self-interest where I use the time that I have here within each breath to support what I want to do and what my desires consist of and exist as, fearing changing myself from this system of existence where I only consider myself into life where I as life support life in all ways always, letting go of myself in this system and walking into a new existence of myself as life where I exist within breath in all ways and stop the system that abuses and kills life that is the mind through stopping myself from participating within the mind and birthing myself here as life through breathing and directing myself within breath and not from thought

I commit myself to deciding to use my time to support myself here as life and to support all life here equal and one to live a life that is dignified and all that is needed to live on this planet is unconditionally provided to all life on this planet through giving up my time to investigate and support an equal money system as a point in change of the money system where money is not about ones own survival and self-interest within greed and desire but a tool used to support all life here unconditionally within the best life possible and to in this work and live within a system where all on this planet are considered and where work is done to support the best life possible for all life on this planet so that we all may live a life of dignity where starvation does not exist, where all beings have access to running water and flushing toilets, where all are provided unconditional health care, education, housing, etc - all that is necessary to live

I commit myself to restructuring my life and time so that I give all of my effort and life to supporting a life that is best for all life - walking into and letting go of the fear of changing my existence into an existence where life is supported through change myself within the usage of my time here on this Earth to support and Equal Money system in all ways, and to Apply myself diligently and directively in stopping myself from participating in the mind using self-forgiveness, self-honesty, and walking each self-corrective action within/as the physical so that I change in fact through the correction into/as what is best for all life

I commit myself to stopping the illusion that I exist within/as that I am an island within this reality that I can participate within/as whatever I want within the mind without consequence, and to in this commit myself to seeing and understanding the consequence and outflow of my participation within the mind, within this stopping that which is abusive and causes extensive harm that I participate in and correct each action of myself into supporting what is best for all life