Sunday, November 11, 2012

Day 211 - Re-Alignment to Responsibility, Direction and Breath Part 6


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for directing myself within self interest and not living the point of responsibility as myself here in breath wherein I cause and create unnecessary conflict within myself because I allow this point of separation between these 2 wants from myself and 2 paths that I see that I could walk - self interest or responsibility - and as I walk the point of self-interest allow myself to judge myself from directing myself along/within that path when/as I can be directing myself differently - in this creating a point of separation between myself in the thought process of `I could be doing something different` as I allow myself to walk self-interest allowing myself to create a point of conflict and confusion and frustration within myself instead of allowing myself to be here with myself in breath - stopping the thoughts of I could be doing something else and stopping the thoughts that are within the context of `I am participating in self interest, I need to stop` and in stopping these thoughts realize that I am able to realign myself within the point of self interest into/as responsibility within the same activity/event and that responsibility and self interest do not always exist in separate events but it is simply who I am within each of the events - am I in self-interest or am I living the point of responsibility for myself within/as the event

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to allow myself to conflict with myself over walking within self interest by allowing myself to think that I am doing something wrong within/as living within self interest - not giving myself the opportunity to understand myself within self-interest nor giving myself to opportunity to realign myself in that moment of self interest into the self interest of what is best for all life in this world - to best support all life in that one moment - instead of supporting and wanting my own interests within energy

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that there is opportunity within self-interest to change myself within that moment of self-interest into a point of responsibility for myself within it and to consider the interest of all life within the point that I am participating in self interest within - and that it is not to avoid or run away from the points that I am participating within self interest within but to investigate myself within them and to change myself within them because I will not every give myself the ability to change within it if I do not walk into it and change myself within/as it because I will never be certain if the change is real unless I have lived it - walked through the point of/as self interest and change myself within it to living what is best for all within that situation/event/moment

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to immediately and absolutely live within the point of responsibility, direction and breath within one moment - without walking myself through the points that I am not taking responsibility within/as to change myself within/as those points, those aspects of myself where I do not live responsibility, or absolute direction, I am not able to be certain of myself within/as myself within the living statements that I've made as I've only allowed myself to avoid and run away from the aspects of myself where I live within self-interest and in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I must walk through myself within self-interest, changing myself within self-interest to the interest of what is best for all life as that is beneficial of self interest and that in this I am not able to make a clear concise living statement of who I am within a specific moment if I do not in fact live that statement of who I am within that moment - but only delusion myself within that statement within the hope and expectation of myself in that one moment - instead of living responsibility for myself in that moment and deliberately taking it upon myself to breathe and walk that change breath by breath by breath in that one moment from self-interest into what is best for all life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I am able to equalize myself to all points that I must walk within this world - equally participating in each point - equally giving my attention to myself in each point that I walk - not placing separation on each point such as walking within a relationship vs walking the education system - not separating each point between self interest and responsibility - realizing that the point here is me - the point that I must focus on is me, it is not doing this over that but making sure that I live within the definition and statement of responsibility within each point that I walk through in my life allowing myself to direct myself within each point in responsibility - not separating myself within each point within the definition of walking within a relationship is not responsibility and that walking the education system is responsibility - in this realizing that I am the point to change - not the external point of what I allow myself to participate within/as

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear fucking up myself in regards to allowing myself to participate more in self interest than directing myself within the point in which I allow myself to participate in self interest fear causing myself to fall into self interest and in this fear not see that I am in fact creating myself within falling by allowing myself to fear myself within the point and continuing to move within the point and in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that it is not to fear myself within self interest but to take it face on and face myself within it and direct myself within it within self honesty within absolute responsibility for myself and all within the point of self interest to make sure that I create that point of what is best for all within/as myself in/as that point in which I live within self interest

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear self interest, to fear not living the point of responsibility and direction within self interest to live the point of responsibility for myself in breath when/as approaching a point of self interest - and in this fear to not allow myself the opportunity to walk through the point of living responsibility for directing myself within the point of self interest, because I've allowed myself to separate myself from myself through the fear of not being able to direct/control myself as if who I am has already been decided in that one moment of choosing to walk within self interest.


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