Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Day 250 - 21 Days of Self Application - Stress SF


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I am stressed out cause myself to go into a tunnel vision wherein I only look for the specific things that are on my mind, look for the specific answers on a test, or look for the specific materials that I am looking for, disregarding everything else that I see at that moment if it does not represent the solution that I am looking for within the cause of my stress, allowing myself to limit myself from actually seeing the answer or consider more options than what I am thinking at that moment, and in this causing myself to more often than not miss the answer or fail to consider that I am not thinking about the right answer, or thinking about the right solution to a problem in which I am stressed out about

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take a step back from everything that I am stressing myself out about, and stop the tunnel vision that I've created through the stress and the pressure of necessity within finding the right answer, and breathe and open up my vision by letting go of the limitation of the tunnel vision through the energy within stressing myself out, and separate myself from the belief of the need to find out the answer, and in this give myself a clear mind to look at things from a different perspective, to start considering more options than the singular option that I am looking for and tunnelling myself within as I am stressing myself to find the answer, and in breathing bring myself out of the energetical reaction of/as stress and fear of not knowing the answer and the fear of getting the answer wrong, and start to look at everything that I am doing, start to look at all the acitons that I am participating in, the equations that I am working with, the numbers that I am working with, the movements that Iam working with, the environment that I am working within, opening myself up to other possibilities to consider and not allow myself to singularly focus on the one the one solution or answer to a problem that I am having within stressing myself out, in this releasing myself from the pressure I am placing myself under by stopping the pressure of the tunnel vision and tunnelled mind by considering more than the one thing that I am looking for

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fail to realize when I am stressing myself out, fail to be aware when/as I am stressing myself out on a test, or at work, or as I walk daily tasks, and in this failure to realize when/as I am stressing myself out and the limitation I am placing myself under within the stress, blindly continue to stress myself out in the thought and belief that stressing myself out in this manner will allow me to focus in on the answer, and to find the answer faster, not realizing that it is absolutely the opposite because I am not allowing myself to see everything that I am doing that is involved with answering the question, or everything that is involved within what I am physically participating in, and in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blindly continue with stress over an answer throughout the rest of the time in which I am participating in the same activity causing myself to further limit myself from being able to effectively walk a solution to any problem that I am facing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that breath is the solution when I am stressing myself out, wherein in breathing taking myself out of the stress and taking a step back from the whole situation is what is best for me because as I breath and separate myself from the stress and the tunnel vision and the singularity of the answer that I am looking for, I am able to give myself more of a perspective in that which I am looking at and working within and as I breathe I can calm myself down and look more at the processes in which I took to get myself to the point of a wrong answer, and assess where/how/what I could be failing to consider in the processes that is leading to the wrong answer - and in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to instead of breathing and slowing myself down do the complete opposite where I speed myself up and rush through the question again and again and again, thinking about all the ways that I may be able to solve it, thinking about all the ways I may have fucked up the answer, not realizing that in thinking these things I am still within a point of singularity in each thought that I have regarding where or how I've fucked up and I am thinking from a knowledge base and I am not seeing what I've physically written on the paper and what I've physically went through the get the answer that was wrong and I am not seeing where/how I went wrong to provide myself the wrong answer, I am only jumping to another conclusion of what I may have done wrong which is not actually assessing the problem by walking myself through the processes and considering all points within the processes, I am only jumping to conclusions

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to avoid facing the stress that I put myself through by deciding to play video games, or eat junk food wherein I ignore and distract myself from the under lying stresses that I am going through at that moment, and in doing so, suppress the stress that I put myself through instead of writing it out and facing it within the moment that I feel stressed out, writing it out when the time is practical, and in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not support myself as life by writing myself out when I am feeling stressed out, writing out the options, writing out the considerations that I am going through, writing out the practical solutions to the stress and become content with the options that I have, wherein I would allow myself to be content with a low mark on the exam and in writing myself out in seeing what I've allowed myself to compromise myself within by allowing stress and fear to run me while I was writing the exam, apply corrective statements on how to practically work with myself next time I am stressed and again creating the tunnel vision and limitation within stress

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that the suppression of stress causes a detrimental effect on my health within diabetes and within the organs overall, because as I am stressed out the body is as well put under this pressure from stress and if I do not work out the stress the body is going to maintain that stress and pressure in which can cause issues later on if the stress is not effectively approached and diffused and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to come home and immediately decide to play video games and entertain myself to avoid facing he stress and to create a distraction from the stress that I am going through instead of coming home and separating myself from that tunnel vision and thought process of singularity and writing myself out from the stress that I put myself through when writing the exam - and effectively direct myself within the stress, and in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sleep when feeling stressed out wherein the pressure still exists within the body and in sleeping the physical processes of activity are lessened and since the pressure is still there - causes a detrimental effect to myself in health

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not consider the health of the body when/as I am stressed out, but only consider what I want to do within that stress, only consider avoiding that stress, not realizing that in avoidance I am ignoring the health of the body and only sabotaging myself by not facing the stress, writing it out, and living a practical solution to myself within the stress

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create stress within myself as I was writing the exam, creating stress by allowing myself to fret over one question that I was not understanding, fret that this would lead to the entirety of the exam being a waste, fret about getting a low mark because I was not absolutely understanding the material, and fret that my average would drop below that which I required of myself because of the exam mark - allowing myself to stress myself out over all of these assumptions about the exam and the possibilities of the exam, instead of simply working with that which was there in the moment, working with one question at a time, working with seeing all words and formulas that that question was asking and in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to get way too far ahead of myself in thought and ideas about what/how the exam will turn out through my application of myself on it, instead of working on one question at a time with clarity about the question - not fretting or thinking about what the other questions are or what they are asking or how much time I have left to answer all the questions, and simply work on the one question at a time, figuring out what it is asking and then answering to the best of my ability in/as the knowledge that is available within me - in this not stressing about the knowledge but working through all possibilities within the information that I have within myself.

I commit myself to when/as I am stressing myself out within an exam and or time and or an activity and or my ability of my application of myself in an event/task/scenario etc to slow myself down by breathing and separating myself from all of the processes that are going on within the mind and stop myself in all the thoughts about the what ifs and the considerations of what will be if this is that, and clear my mind of all the thoughts and focus on one question at a time, one movement at a time, focusing on what is here within a breath, and in focusing on what is here within one breath - focus on looking at what the question is practically asking, focus on what I am doing within the event/task, and open myself up to possibilities of consideration of all possible points within the question or within the task/event and appropriately walk myself in breath within one question/action/event at a time

I commit myself to when/as I have stressed myself out and I am free from the environment of that stress to write myself out when I come home or when I am done the other things that I had to do within that moment and support myself by diffusing the stress and writing out sf statements and sc statements to a level where I release myself from stressing myself out and where I am no longer participating in the thoughts that are leading me to become stressed out

I commit myself to practically support myself moving through stress and diffusing the stress by/as writing myself out and applying sf statements and sc statements when I am available to do so - and when/as the thought of entertaining myself or eating junk food comes up to breathe and not participate in that thought, letting it go unconditionally and sit down with myself and write myself out

I commit myself to stopping getting ahead of myself when writing an exam or participating in an event, or working and be here with myself in breath and work with that which is here in breath focusing on one point at a time, and as I start to think about the what ifs and the possibilities of a scenario within working or writing an exam, to bring myself back here and focus on the one question or one order that I am working on, and focus on the point of one breath at a time, in this I commit myself to put in effort to remaining here in each breath and aware of the breaths that I take

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