Monday, December 31, 2012

Day 256 - 21 Days of Self Application - Falling for Energy


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when being presented the idea to indulge in energy, not think, or consider the actions that I will be embarking on, but only look at the energy that I will be getting from living in the idea, and in this process fuck with myself and sabotage myself in/as my application of myself in/as effective change of myself and effective application of myself in/as this physical reality to give myself responsibility for myself to live a different way, a way in which I am not abusive nor destructive to myself as life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fail to consider what I am doing to myself, rather, ignore the consideration of what I am doing to myself and allowing myself to become through living within the attempts to gain as much energy as possible through the living acts in which I've associated and created energy from, in this failing to consider what I am doing to the body and what I am doing to the creation of myself, what I am allowing myself to become and live within through allowing myself to be a `sucker` for energy and allow myself to abuse the body and life for energy

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not consider what I am allowing within all others by allowing that which I allow within myself in the pursuit of energy, failing to consider that what I allow within myself I will allow within another and as I allow myself to fall for energy within the thought of energy within the idea of gaining energy from participating within the misuse of money, sex, the body, food etc wherein I abuse and mistreat that which is here as life, I allow within another and allow within the world system and in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see the responsibility that I have for this world within the singularity that I am to change myself in not accepting the fall for energy so that I am able to show and live an example of/as how to not fall for energy within others, and stop accepting myself and others equally in the fall for energy

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel that I am helpless and a victim to energy, to participating in that which I allow myself to abuse life and manifest energy from, not allowing myself to see that I am within the decision to allow myself to fall for that energy and thus not allowing myself to give myself the responsibility and live responsibility for myself in/as the decision to stop making the same decisions in which I allow myself to fall for the energy and abuse myself as life and consequently allow the abuse of all life through my acceptance of myself in the fall for energy, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that within saying no to myself in/as the pursuit of energy, the point within saying no is to stabilize myself here within the physical in breath and consider myself as life and what I would do to myself if I made the choice to participate in energy and not to deitize myself for not moving within the point of energy - to not hold myself up on a horse for not participating in energy, but to simply walk it for myself within the realization of what I've allowed myself to become within falling for energy and to not make the same decisions further more, and state till here to further will I allow myself to fall for the pursuit of energy/positivity/happiness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, within change, not be humble with myself in changing myself but hold myself in a golden light wherein I give myself an air of superiority over myself and others, failing to consider what I've allowed within myself in the past, failing to consider where I've come from, failing to consider that I am still equal to those that walk within the decision to fall for energy, and that I, within one choice, am able to fall back into the same patterns of energy, within one moment of failed consideration for who I am as life, am able to easily fall back into abusive patterns through allowing myself to put myself on a pedestal for making only one decision to not participate in energy

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to play the fool within energy by allowing myself to fool myself into superiority within any point of change, fooling myself by allowing myself to believe that I have changed without the proof and evidence that exists within the application of myself through time and in the belief of change, give myself a false sense of self satisfaction, not realizing that I am still quite susceptible to the fall for energy because I have not moved through it in every opportunity that arises in my life, and have only made the decision a very small amount of times in regards to how many times I've made the decision to participate in the fall for energy/positivity/happiness - only to delude myself and give myself a false sense of trust of who I am and what I am doing on this Earth at this point in time within my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fail to realize what I am allowing myself to do and become and what I am allowing within the world system through my participation within the fall for energy/positivity/happiness fail to consider that what I am accepting within myself I am accepting within the world in it's entirety and that I not only have a responsibility unto myself to change but I have a responsibility unto the future generations to change who I am, that I have a responsibility unto all others in this world to change who I am and this goes equally so for each being walking Earth at this moment, and within this that it is important to place myself in the shoes of all others and see how who I am and what I allow within myself effects all others on this planet and to then ask myself the question if I would want that for myself, if I would want who I am and what I allow within myself and the effects it has on the others for myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be humble with who I am within process at this moment, humble within the realization of who I am and what I am accepting and allowing within myself and within this humbleness approach myself with a calm gentle push to walk through the fall for energy and to start to find out what it really means to live in this world within the physical without the bullshit and illusions that exist within the creation of energy, and in this humbleness, never place myself on a pedestal but always keep myself grounded within the continuous decision to not participate in the illusion of the uplifting feelings that pertain to energy/happiness/positivity and to in this as well stop myself from going into the opposite polarity of negativity/sadness/and still energy - within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be arrogant and egotistical in my approach to change, defining myself as `this is who I am within change` in this not allowing myself to really change who I am through allowing myself to first define myself within who I am within change, and then each time a point of change presents itself to myself as me, fall again for the energy within the belief of who I am within change and the superiority I've created myself within/as changing myself in my living acceptances and allowances

I commit myself to when/as I tempt myself with the fall for energy within happiness/positivity/energy to be humble with myself in the choice to not participate in it, humbleness within breath, and in this to stop myself from thinking the thought `no this is not who I am, I am `better` than this` and through that stop myself from making myself `more` than who/what I really am within the breath

I commit myself to breathing when I tempt, or am tempted, with energy/money/happiness and in breathing, give myself humbleness to walk away from the temptation, give myself the actual effective choice to walk away from it by breathing and stopping myself from reacting in the egotistical belief concerning who I am in regards to this one point at this one point in time and that I am `better` than this one point, and in this I commit myself to seeing how I am, in fact, equal to the point in which I decide to change myself within, I am not more than nor less than the point, I am the point, and I am the decision

I commit myself to when/as tempted to move into an energetical experience to direct myself away form that energetical experience and if it continues to exist within me to stop everything and sit down with myself and breathe through the temptation for energy until it is gone and then direct myself within something in which I find no positivity or energy or happiness, something in which I am able to practically apply myself within such as homework, studying, DIP lessons/assignments and in this to give myself a gift of self respect within not giving into energy and stop sabotaging myself by calming myself down from the temptation for energy

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